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Two Dads: Considering Another Baby
June 7, 2011 by The Next Family
Filed under Chris Coyne, Family, Same Sex Parent
By: Chris Coyne
The last few months have been a huge learning lesson for all of us. I know I am still considered a newbee parent after these challenging 16 months. I also know I am doing my best trying to guess my way through the endless decisions I make daily that will eventually shape the child I am raising. A few months back if someone would have asked me if I would consider adopting another child I would have definitely said no. Jon and I have always jumped back and forth on expanding our family. Things change. We adapt. We see beyond the day-to-day challenges and see the blessings. Fatherhood has been very rewarding and we all want more.
It started with a short conversation between Jon and me. Should we? Do we really want another? Can we do it? Yes we can. We know in our hearts we do want another child. It took years to have a great match with a perfect birthmother. We do not want CJ to be an only child and it seems like every other child around him has another sibling.
What is next? Lots of paperwork! We are meeting with a Maryland home study social worker today. We have to jump through a few hundred hurdles to get the paperwork done, get some more blood tests, write a bunch of checks for this and that, and then we wait. We had a great experience with the attorney who found CJ’s birthmother so we are going to use him again. This requires a few trips to California, but it gives us the opportunity to see our friends and family who we really miss.
Tonight CJ woke up and needed some additional rocking and loving before finally passing out. A few seconds before his eyes finally closed they locked on mine and he cracked a half smile before dosing off. It was a great moment. My happy little boy will be a big brother some day. We do not know when it will happen, or whether it will be a boy or a girl, but we opened that door and it feels great.
Congrats on the decision. You are a terrific Dad and I know you and Jon will have all the patience and energy for another child in your home. Can’t wait to follow this journey.
So excited for you & Jon – for baby #2 and that you’ll have to come to CA!!!!! xo Tere
I do not think I will ever be able to catch up on anything. Email? Laundry? Phone Calls? We are both really excited! The photo was taken by my wonderful sister in law. She is having a baby boy very soon! So excited to be a guncle!!!
I love your reasons to adopt another baby. You have lots of love to go around. Good luck, I can’t wait to read about this new adventure!
I am in TEARS!!!! Sooooooo excited….can’t wait =) xoxox
I THINK THAT IT WOULD BE GREAT IF YOU GUYS HAVE ANOTHER CHILD. YOU KNOW YOU GUYS HAVE OUR BLESSINGS
Congrats on your decision! Did you happen to use Mark at adopt help? That’s who we used and we loved him and we are also talking about taking the plunge again and finding another perfect angel to join our happy home. But our little one is only 9 months old – so we are waiting just a bit longer! Congrats again and good luck!
Stacey. Mark Goldman was our attorney for a failed adoption two years ago. I am glad you had success with his program. They moved us back into phase one after the failed adoption. They called us a month before CJ was born with a birthmother situation that was way to close to our failed adoption. In fact the birthmother was from the same city as the birthmother who put us through living hell. We basically gave up on Adopthelp after that. Mark did not even know who we were when we spoke to him about the new birthmother. We have Adopthelp on hold as of now. We are working on the paperwork for the home study and we will have to reevaluate this again very soon. Thanks for the good vibes. I hope you are doing well with your little person. I love it and I love our son so much it hurts…