It’s 3:00 pm. Do You Know Where Your Surrogate Is?

By: Kelly Rummelhart


I need to start off by saying that my current IPs are doing a great job communicating with me. I get emails and texts from them weekly and Skype with them every now and then. I actually feel bad at times because I don’t always reply immediately because of how crazy my life is lately. I always try to send them belly pictures and always check in after my OB appointments.

A “HINT” to all Intended Parents . . .

Now I mention this because several surrogates I know are having some real issues with lack of communication with their IPs. I have been hearing stories of weeks going by with no contact initiation from the IPs. There are even some IPs that, even when their surrogate emails and texts them, barely respond. Not right! Especially when the IPs stated on their profile and within the match meeting that they wanted great communication with their surrogate.

I am upset about this for my surro-friends; actually I’m pissed. I have in the past had my own feelings of feeling ignored or forgotten at times in the process and it doesn’t feel good at all. So a hint for all IPs out there . . . it takes less than 30 seconds to text, “Hi. How are you doing?” or “Thinking about you” to your surrogate. You know the woman who is carrying your baby/babies . . . the woman who is making lots of sacrafices to bring your flesh and blood into the world.

She deserves a call/text/email back!

She deserves to hear from you without having to initiate a conversation.

She deserves to not feel like she is alone in this process.

If you want to have a happy surrogate and a good birthing experience (not having your surrogate mad at you or hurt because of your lack of concern), it would be a very good idea to let her know she is appreciated and what better way to tell her than to actually TELL HER?!

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Comments

  1. says

    I can’t even imagine not hearing from IP’s continually along the way if I was a surrogate. If they are not engaging now how will they be as parents?????? I would be constantly wondering. Why would an IP not want to stay in contact throughout the pregnancy? Just don’t get it.

  2. says

    I’ve had both ends of the spectrum. My favorite is after the birth and they “don’t have time” to send a text picture once in a while in those early post-partum days. A little show of appreciation goes a long way.

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