By Wendy Rhein
I don’t do resolutions. I don’t like the idea of setting myself up to fail by creating some bubbly-induced grandiose goals that are based on pure fantasy and some 11:58pm longing to be someone I’m not. I do, however, believe in reflection and intention.
As any psychologist or self-help reader can tell you, the idea of intention is to put out into the universe the positive energy and words – actual words – for what you want. You speak your intentions in the present tense, making them current and real, and you use precise verbs and nouns. You are not trying or wanting, you ARE.
Reflections are easy. We reflect on things all the time. The problem I find is that they often come out as regrets or unfulfilled desires. At the end of the year I like to reflect on things I learned about myself, about my world, that changed my perceptions or how I operate in the world.
So, as this year ends, I am offering some of my reflections and intentions for what has passed and what is coming. Try it. It is much more fun than promising for the 8th year in a row to lose the same 15 pounds or that you’ll try to be a better communicator.
Reflections – things I learned in 2011.
1. I don’t have to be married to my job to be happy in my life.
2. Elmo is really a 50-something black man with an incredible imagination and vocal range. Compare the visuals of man and muppet. If he can find that red and fuzzy iconic character inside of himself, what can I find in myself?
3. While I was taking cooking classes, something I had always wanted to do and finally did in 2011, I was more creative, more centered, and more focused in all other areas of my life. All of which went away again when the classes were over. There is a lesson there.
4. It is much harder to make friends as a grown up than it was in grade school.
5. Judgments made about me and my family are other people’s problems, not mine.
Intentions for 2012
1. I am writing every day, fiction or non-fiction. Every day.
2. I am taking 4 more cooking classes or series of classes, one each season.
3. I am taking a trip with my best friend of 20 + years, no kids, no spouses.
4. I am dating again, focusing on a life partner and not a dinner date. I welcome dating as an adventure and not a painful blight on 40+ singletons.
5. Oh, and I am 15 pounds lighter and a much better communicator.